There's a Nap for That

Last week, I had the pleasure of keeping my two little grandsons for the week while their mommy and daddy took a trip. It never ceases to amaze me how enlightening it is to revisit  "full time" parenting of young children.   As grandparents, most of the time we are just the cheerleading squad.  We get to stay on the side lines while the parents get to do the hard work of quarterbacking, tackling, and running the field while we give them "high fives" and  "way to go".   Yay, TEAM!!!

However, every once in a while we get a taste of what it's like to really be in the game and it's interesting...and busy and exhausting.  Turns out the game is harder than a person would think. Now I know that might sound strange given the fact, I used to be a full time mom of small children but it appears that chaos is a  acclimated environment.  Yes, like plunging into very cold water.  After awhile you adapt and don't notice that you have hypothermia.  Same with parenting little kids.  When you are in the metaphoric freezing pool of chaos you aren't noticing that your limbs are falling off.


But.....perhaps I am just out of practice.   OR maybe it's that AND things have changed in the years since I had a three year old and a six year old on a regular basis.

Thought Number One:  Some Things Have Changed While Others Remain the Same

It turns out that some thing regarding care for children are about the same as it has always been.  Bathing, brushing teeth, eat your vegetables, time for bed, stay in bed, no we aren't reading another bedtime story, no you have gone to the potty 3 times now,  no you aren't thirsty, ...are you up again?....

Yes, all of that seems fairly familiar but other things...TOTALLY different.

First of all technology came visiting and decided to worm it's way into the psyche of all living beings, including the toddler and grade school set.  For example:   Riding in a car.

AHHH..remember the good ole days when you would travel with your parents and somewhere between the license plate bingo or "I spy with my little eyes" there would be a bout of "he's touching me...make him stop!"  At that point,  any parent worth their weight in "false threats" would shout via the use of the rear view mirror.  "DO I HAVE TO STOP THIS CAR?"  Ahhh..such good memories, huh?

Today you may start out playing the "my little eyes" game but today's children are at a huge disadvantage aren't they.  They are buckled into a chair that is reminiscent of torture devices that prevent them from half hanging out the window to find the object that is being spied upon.  No more laying in the back deck above the rear seat to check out the license plates for the bingo game.  Thank goodness, they have been strapped down since infancy and don't recognize the fact they are extremely uncomfortable. 

BUT as luck would have it...technology has compensated.  Now the dual screen DVR player loaded with Disney movies lures your little ones into a video induced car coma.  Bliss, pure bliss...for both the driver and the little passengers.

However there is a caveat. Twice in the week during their stay with grandma, I needed to take hubby to the airport.  This is our life..driving to and from the Kansas City airport so grandpa can travel hither and yon. The problem is that the Kansas City airport was built in the middle of nowhere to accommodate all the little towns in the middle of the country.  So while it is an hour north of  where I live, it's quite handy for the people in southern Iowa.

Knowing that children would be in the mix for this week's airport runs, I had to make sure there was a  decent movie line up for my vehicle's DVRs.(quit shaking your head...I realize this is another First World problem)  In preparation for the trip,  I give great thought to what movies might hold their attention for 2 hours.  This would of worked out really well except for the fact, Disney animated movies only last about 1.5 hours.  By the time I am 20 minutes from home, the movie has ended and we can't play any "look out the window" games...because it's dark out in the middle of nowhere.  Damn the Disney company for not developing special DVDs that last 12 hours at a pop for long trips.  Modern parenting is so complicated.

Thought Number Two:  Wrangling the Chaos

Of course, I have plenty of opportunity to see close up how my daughter and her family go about their daily routines.  Very impressive, if I say so myself, how they seem to manage a complicated schedule for two little boys that go to two different schools and both working parents work that outside the home.  They make it look easy.  Turns out it isn't...at least not when I am in charge.

I would say the getting them up, clean, sweet smelling, fed and out the door and on time to school is the easy part.  Dealing with any situation that involves other parents...TOTAL NIGHTMARE.

First morning out, I arrive at the grade school with 10 minutes to spare before the first bell rings to find cars lined up a full block back from the school.  The one way circle drive is stacked two-wide with moms that are all but shoving kids out of  "seemingly still moving" vehicles. There is a sense of urgency in the allotted time allowed for kiddos to get out.  I, however, am a novice and am not entirely comfortable at thrusting my little grandson out the door like a bag of trash tossed onto the curb. There is the added component that I am taking care of someone elses children. Maybe there would of been a time with my own kids that I would of come to a rolling stop and yelled " Last person to hit the pavement is a rotten egg" but I am overly cautious with my grandkids.

 The mom behind me was having none of it. My lack of urgency wasn't to her liking.  It didn't escape my notice as she passed me in the "unloading" lane that she gave me the evil eye.  I probably cost her an extra 3 minutes in her busy day. I am assuming it would be really bad form to flip off a mommy at the grade school so I just pretend I am senile and hope that people blame the dementia for any infractions on my part.

Speaking of  BUSY...as the week progressed, I had a chance to talk to quite a few mommies at the soccer game, swim lessons, preschool etc. and there seems to be a shift in what mommies talk about in 2014 as opposed to the early 1980s.  No longer do they talk about recipes or what's new at the mall they talk about how busy they are at work and how tired they are.

Oh...don't get me wrong.  I am sure they are tired.  I was exhausted and I was only on day 5.  How parents work the type of jobs they have today and still manage all that goes with modern parenting is absolutely beyond my comprehension.  Still it's interesting to listen in on the conversation.

It appears that whenever a group of women congregate the conversation at some point goes to the number of hours of sleep each person  in the group had the prior night. 



Tired woman A.  " I only got 5 hours of sleep last night!"
Tired woman B " I haven't had 5 hours of sleep since little Jason was born."
Tired woman C. "I haven't had 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep in 10 years." 
Woman D.         " I try to get 8 hours every night."

At this point all conversation stops and every one in the group sends a variety of looks varying from disgust to pity.  (The group is concluding that  any woman getting 8 hours of sleep is failing short in some important way.) 


As the interloper among the group, I wouldn't dare mention that while I may or may not sleep well, it's not because, of my unmanageable schedule or my hectic pace.  It's because I am on Team Grandparents and my time is my own.  Yay team!



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